Ribbon
name, i haven't one yet, tiles and letters are all
still fragments, ascending through the curved lip of a
gray cloud
flipped onto a bright month, low pressures that this
sea thrives through
room to me, it is a room too, a
curtain of
flecks
deliriously cold
glad you could make it
a word
thumbed through, pages, were bodies once,
jagged instruments
move against spirit like
lightning,
crisp
breath it unfolds, unfurls
still fragments, ascending through the curved lip of a
gray cloud
flipped onto a bright month, low pressures that this
sea thrives through
room to me, it is a room too, a
curtain of
flecks
deliriously cold
glad you could make it
a word
thumbed through, pages, were bodies once,
jagged instruments
move against spirit like
lightning,
crisp
breath it unfolds, unfurls
posted by Scott Glassman at 1:07 PM
10 Comments:
I used the last word of each of your lines, in reverse order, to make this one.
Have you ever read Diane Wakoski's "Blue Monday"? A fantastic deep image poem. I might like to try experimenting with deep image if you're interested.
by "deep image" you mean. . .
It means carrying an image down through the poem, like in Diane Wakoski's "Blue Monday" she basically repeats the word blue throughout different parts of the poem, attaching it to various images etc. Jerome Rothenberg has been known for using the same technique, and it was either he or Robert Bly who coined the term. The concept originally came from Frederico Garcia Lorca as he incorporated peasant songs from the fields into his surrealist poetry. Lorca called it duende a Spanish word for "deep knowledge through beauty or death". I've been into Spanish poets lately, reading Octavio Paz and Lorca. Here's a really simple lyric where Lorca uses the method--
Variations
The still waters of the air
under the bough of the echo.
The still waters of the water
under a frond of stars.
The still waters of your mouth
under a thicket of kisses.
So I guess it can be a phrase carried through too, and I find it more powerful that way, but if it is, it is always image-focused.
I'll email you that Diane Wakoski poem which is a real knock-out.
Maybe some OULIPO with your coffee.
Sounds great, Scott. I like the idea. . .the restrictiveness of it seems a necessary evil for me. Should we try to both extend a similar image and see what each separate poem looke like?
I recently read a great little essay about Duende, but I can't even remember where I read it. . .though it seems to me that Duende is a certain type of deep image, no? But you say that that is the point of origin, so I suppose that makes sense.
yeah, let's try that, but make it a phrased image . . . maybe something lush, that rushes away, or strange like a rare flower, a "rash of orchids in jasmine sky" flew into mind, ooo i might use that one!
also, on my blog, I experimented with combining deep image with Haynaku and abecedarian . . . I thought the result was interesting, and might try a couple more with other 6-letter sequences. i'd be curious to know what you thought . . . if it comes across as too constrained, or straining . . . (wow, i'm into ellipses today)
I like a rash of orchids. As long as it's not diaper rash :) I'll do it too.
This also looks fun
http://www.arts.unimelb.edu.au/%7Eespaces/
interesting site, i don't know French though . . .
If you look closely, there is an english translation. . .
basically, you start with a one or two letter word and add a letter as the poem descends (not necessarily building off of the same word)
I
am
any
slow
guild
shrill
peasant
building
burrowing
techniques
incorporate
well, you get the idea. . .
we should try that
Post a Comment
<< Home